Since July of last year Hobbles has been living in Maryland, running a frightfully unsuccessful used car dealership called "Big Bill Hell's Cars". Below you'll find on of their most prevalent, but wholly ineffective commercials.
Since Hobbles isn't here to add color commentary to my articles, he promised that he'd occasionally send me a list of the custom insults that he approved for me to use in his stead, and the situations in which to use them. I've been eagerly waiting, hiding in a bush, by the mailbox waiting for the day that the mailman might bring the ray of violent-hope that a letter from Hobbles would contain.
The wait is over. And I just peed myself out of excitement.
Let the expletive infixation begin:
- Used as a direct insultory adjective to insinuate that someone has a dick the size of a standard, non-national-geographic, nipple.
Nippledickory, adverb
- Used as a noun to point out that a certain someone has the thought-process and comprehension of a clam that even other clams deem to be an ass.
To Assclam Around, Verb
- Used as an noun towards someone whom appears to have the consistency of a burlap sack filled with fuck. AKA: Four pounds of fuck in a three pound fucksack.
Fucksacking, Verb
- Used as an expletive to shout out at the dismay of another's actions, or situation. Ah nippleshit!
- An noun to describe someone who infuriates you so much, that you wish to incapacitate them by fucking their neck.
Fuckneckory, Adverb
- Noun that indicates someone is a dick to the power of two, and that their dick actually sucks other smaller dicks.
Cockdicking, Verb
- A noun that describes someone as a wet, floppy, stinky and useless individual.
Cuntsleever, Adjective
- Noun describing an over-sensitive person that generates nothing but shit.
Clitshittery, Adverb
- Basically translates to: you're an stinky, wrinkly, retarded asshole that's full of balls.
After those, I assumed the letter was over.
Until I turned the page over and found a beautiful, yet crude, drawing.
I guess Maryland is going well for him.