Here's a fun guessing game I came up with, that I call "Pick What American's Find Most Important"
Here're the options:
1) Starving children in Africa
2) Turning into a meat byproduct
3) Figuring out how to exchange our wives for a new DVD player
4) Heath Ledger's death
Clearly number 4 ranks right up there, because we all knew Heath on such a personal level.
I remember that one time good ol' Heath came over to help put in new flooring in my condo, and many good times ensued. He's such a personable guy, that the common man can connect with easily.
Nothing matters more than a celebrity's death, in the grand scheme of our day to day lives.
Cue theme song from "24"
9:45 AM - coworker comes by: "Did you hear? Heath Ledger died."
10:00 AM - text message: Heath Ledger died
10:30 AM - internet: Google.com effectively shut down due to too much Heather Ledger news being posted.
11:15 AM - schools across the nation: Assemblies were called to help soothe all the undoubtedly grieving children touched by this event, or perhaps by Heath himself.
12:30 PM - lunch destination: I walk up to find the restaurant closed out of respect for the fallen hero.
1:30 PM - national television and radio: President declares the day a national holiday in remembrance.
3:00 PM - nationwide: Nation is crippled due to 73% of the population being in a state of curled up in the fetal position, weeping uncontrollably.
3:54 PM - down the street: A man is stabbed 12 times and dies is a pool of his own blood. No one cares.
6:00 PM - city bus: A sassy black woman asks her friend "did you hear about Heath Ledger? It's so sad."
For all time: I couldn't give a fuck less.
If you have so little going on in your life that you have to siphon pain from a celebrity's death, then go break some part of you so that you might reprioritize your life.
How many times did you ever hear about Heath Ledger when he was alive? Maybe twice? Because he played a gay cowboy?
I'm sure the gay cowboy / fringe-popular actor life is near and dear to all our hearts.
I predict that much like Tupac, Mr. Ledger will continue making a new movie every year, postmortem.
Sure, it's no clown, cowboy, or....whatever other roles he had. But he's so hot right now!